I'm in a stage right now where moving forward and looking backwards at the same time is going to harm you. Especially your walk in Faith with Messiah. It's hard to explain, and really has nothing to do with my eating but has everything to do with my attitude and my strength. Which if failing can have an impact on my eating and my entire well being because as many as you know this flesh means nothing but my spiritual walk everything! Gabriel and I & our three little blessings are going through a time right now... or maybe it is just me! Meaning there is a path ahead of us but it has this HUGE question mark right in the middle of it.... I'm not saying it has to do with who we believe in, more just that the journey that lays ahead is one that is wide open to anything and everything...where, how, when and with whom? haha... I'm probably confusing you, aren't I! The unknown awaits us... but I'm more willing to control it so I have an idea of what's going on, instead of fully allowing Yahweh 100% control.
I have a hard time adjusting to this type of faith... believing all things will be taken care of and I just sit back and wait..... and wait......... wait....... and wait some more. I know I sound bad. faithless. honestly I sound like a weepy brat who wants her way just cause it feels better than to have HIS WAY! I ask you to forgive me... but I'm really trying to understand this journey because I want it with my whole heart but I'm so afraid of the unknown that I become foolish and weak in my thinking and allow the enemy to have a Hay Day with my emotions, and yes that is all this is.... EMOTIONS... I have become emotional (I could justifie it because I am a mommy of 3 young children but that would be wrong, I'm still accountable none-the-less). unwilling to deal with the fact that all is being handled, it's just the "unknown factor". You'd think by now I would have learned because of course this is not the first time I've had to learn this lesson. Yet I'm still failing the execution to bring about courage and hope for whats to come. Maybe it's because I see it everyday... you know the home life, the waiting gets harder cause I'm the one moving about in the functions that become hard to function??? I know once again you must be thinking I've lost it! But I'm trying to write this like I feel inside.
So as I write I also become encouraged because I feel the Ruach show me examples of the unknown like the Israelite's coming out of Egypt! What more of the unknown could that be.... yet they too had there trials but they did end up making it to the Promise land (exdous 3 starts Moses journey.. but goes into many books..). Then there is The three hebrew servants Rack, Shack and Bendy! (Daniel 3) Actually their reals names were Hananiah, Azaryah and Mishel. Think of their unknown but yet that didn't stop them from Honoring their Heavenly Father even unto death if that be so. There are so many things that encourage me to quit straying with my mind and start trusting with my heart!
Psa 39:7 “And now, יהוה, what do I wait for? My expectancy is in You.
Psa 37:9 For evil-doers are cut off; But those who wait on יהוה, They shall inherit the earth
Psa 42:5 Why are you depressed, O my being? And why are you restless within me? Wait for Elohim: for I shall yet thank Him, For the deliverance of His face!
Psa 52:9 I thank You forever, Because You have done it; And in the presence of Your kind ones I wait on Your Name, for it is good.
Psa 59:9 O my Strength, I wait for You; For Elohim is my strong tower, My Elohim of kindness.
Psa 71:14 But I continually wait, And shall praise You more and more.
There are many upon many scritpures that speak of waiting... But that last one hit me hard. I have forgotten to praise Him in this time. this time of the "unknown" I should be praising and lifting up my hands and heart and voice to my maker. It is so vital... yet I have missed that. I will truly tell you that I have felt it too.
I must end here though (little ones need naps)... But I want you to know I'm going to choose to praise... I'm going to walk away from this laptop and lift my voice in prayer and thanksgiving for all the many blessings and beautiful gifts he has given and for what lies ahead. I will choose right this moment and offer up my praise and honor Him. For He is worthy of it all. I ask you though please keep us in your prayers for so many things lay ahead... I pray we walk rightly and righteously towards Yahushua Messiah! For that is all the is important...
HalleluYAH!
Let's RUN!
Sady
Shalom Sadi:) I just dropped in to say hi and I hope you all had a blessed Pesach. I do so love Pesach as our family gathers to remember and honor Abba's gift of His salvation, Yahushuah...how great is that!!
ReplyDeleteI just read your post and I wanted to say I hear your heart as I think we all walk the road that you have described. I thought just this morning how that I have felt trapped by circumstances at times but Abba has revealed that I am not a prisoner of any circumstance only of my thoughts...It can be hard to get past that at times so as you say, I will offer my incense of praise that go up to Him and He will come and dwell with me and give me the peace I need, amein? Yes, that is His promise. I pray I can walk in the rest He offers...there are days though my friend that do challenge.
You know the way to go and Abba does see your great desire to please Him.
Be blessed and filled with peace sis.
Keeping your family in my prayers:)